The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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