overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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