it was like fucking gandolphs beard
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
