you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
