whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
false alarm. still invincible.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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