In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
