before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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