I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Randomize
