Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize
