Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
