I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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