woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
