i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize