I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
