ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
