Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
