I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
