grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize