so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Randomize
