I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
