So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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