two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Boobs speak an international language.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
