cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
