Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize
