My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
