Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
