Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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