as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
