Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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