Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Randomize
