Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
