So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
