Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
