lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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