I want to stick my p in your. b.
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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