I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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