ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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