paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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