Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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