This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
