Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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