I've blown a few things in my day
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
