So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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