and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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