and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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