Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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