I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Randomize
