Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
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