i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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