I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
